How can you start to have better quality conversation about the great stuff that YOU are contributing?
Why is it so hard to talk about the good stuff and promote yourself? Whether it’s great feedback from a peer, an incredible client testimonial, or praise from a manager, compliments on the birthday cake we made….why do we cringe at the thought of sharing all the good stuff that people are saying about us?
I still struggle with this! I was asked recently to do a ‘brand challenge’. Talking about my values was easy; talking about what I did was easy; talking about why I do what I do was even easier. Then it came to this bit where I had to talk about the great stuff that clients say about me…. and I failed! I just couldn’t do it! Having testimonials on a website is one thing but actually talking about the great stuff clients say is another thing all together. (PS: I just had to force myself to write ‘great’ in front of the word ‘stuff’ then! Ugh!)
It’s a recurring theme with so many of my clients and there I was having the same insecurities, same doubts, same concerns going through my head. There is some pretty deep patterning in terms of that little voice in our heads, isn’t there?!
- So if your little voice is saying things like;
- “That would be boastful and self serving”
- “That’s just part of my job – it’s not an ‘achievement’”
- “I don’t like to talk about that stuff and jump up and down like all those other people do”
- “My work speaks for itself!”
- “It’s a team effort, it’s not just me”
- “I couldn’t do it without everyone else and the support of my team”
If those are some of the brain tattoos that you have going on, and you break out in a cold sweat at the thought of sharing the great stuff that people are saying about you, please know that you’re not alone and that it’s OK. But, as always, start with noticing it! Notice what the language is that comes up for you.
How can you start to have better quality conversations about the great stuff that YOU are contributing?
Watch today’s video to learn about why talking about the good stuff gets you more of it!
I challenge you to do two things this week (one is easier than the other!)
ONE: Just start noticing! Start noticing how often you use the word ‘I’ versus the word ‘we’, when you’re talking about achievements or results, or just day to day activities, when you’re on a client call, when you’re in a team meeting, when you’re speaking to your manager. I predict that the “we” word is used more than the “I” word! But let’s see I might be wrong! (Feel free to press reply and let me know if I am!)
TWO: Start documenting why it’s important for you to quieten that little voice that’s holding you back in those moments when you could (and should!) be sharing those great things. The way to overcome that fear of appearing boastful or self centred or being the person that’s jumping up and down and saying ‘it’s all about me!’ is to make something or someone more important than that fear!
Maybe that ‘something’ is a promotion, or maybe it’s a pay rise, or maybe it’s more leadership responsibility. Maybe that ‘someone’ is your three year old daughter (see photo above!) who you want to be a role model for, so she grows up knowing how important it is to be valued for who she is and what she is contributing in the world and that means being able to talk about the good stuff! Whatever it is, create, document and remind yourself of your really compelling ‘why’, only then can you act differently, trust me!
We overcome the inner fears that are holding us back by establishing something, or someone, that is more important than said fear.
Those are my two challenges for you (can you guess which one is easier than the other?!)….. aaaaaaand I will do the same this week….. #mustpracticewhatipreach
Finally, if no one else tells you today, let me be the one to tell you I’m grateful for you. I know you can find a reason to start talking about your great achievements. Thank you for letting me be a part of your day and thank you for being a part of my world.
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