I am a perfectionist!! My perfectionism has been absolutely rampant this week! I’m in the process of finalising my speaker show reel (see sneak peak preview pic to the left…!) and I have been absolutely crippled with every decision being the ‘be all and end all’, over analysing everything, feeling a level of stress that’s just low enough to sustain but just high enough to be very frustrating not just to me but to my entire team and to my family.
Now, I describe myself as a recovering perfectionist because I know I will never not be a perfectionist – it’s like alcoholism, you will never not be an alcoholic. What we need, if you are indeed like me, is to put the structures, the systems, the social support and the mindset into place that enables the behavioural change we need to deal with our perfectionist ‘condition’.
So what does that look like? For example, for me, this week that has meant pulling myself up, noticing the effect I’m having and doing several things. One is to remind myself (you know I love a mantra!):
Done is better than perfect!
(I have that in big, bold letters on an index card, on my desk!!)
This week’s video is all about the practical strategies to liberate yourself from your perfectionism and move forward.
Perfectionism is actually a fear of failure. It is a fear of criticism. And it is a fear of disappointing either yourself or someone else. So, it’s powerful to get your journal out in those moments when you are crippled with the over analysis or the fear, or the not finishing, or the procrastination… and writing down: Who am I afraid of disappointing right now?
Having someone to be accountable to is always a powerful tool. I know, I know – that gives a level of pressure and urgency that probably makes your chest feel tight, but it does force us to get out of our own heads to know that someone else is waiting for that thing or they are going to check up on us.
And then, one of my favourite techniques is to ask myself questions to gain perspective:
- In 10 weeks, will this have been an important moment in my life?
- In 10 months, will I even remember this week and the amount of difficult decisions I had to make?
- In 10 years, will anybody (me or anyone else) care what this looked like?!
It’s a very practical way to pull yourself out from your perfectionism, move yourself forward, and liberate yourself from that anxiety and stress that does NOT need to be there – trust me!
I will have my speaker reel completed by next week (now I’m accountable to you! See what I did there?) and I promise to share it next week! (Deep breath in!).
Finally, if no one else tells you today, let me be the one to tell you I’m grateful for you. I believe we can all live happy, healthy, stress-free lives as recovering perfectionists! Thank you for letting me be a part of your day and thank you for being a part of my world.
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