Celebrating Siffat: Corporate Lawyer Finance Sector

I was searching – searching for answers and ways to better myself. I was very dampened and struggling with anxiety. My confidence has changed – I can see it physically. My face is brighter, I am more vivacious and interactive. I am more certain of myself. I have seen my career improve. I am naturally attracting good people.

Siffat

Tara – High Definition You Coach

Welcome to High Definition You. My name is Tara McCarthy. I’m one of the High Definition coaches. Today I am speaking with Siffat, a corporate lawyer and an amazing woman who has built an incredible life for herself.

So first of all, can you just share with us just a few thoughts on what your life was like what it looked like and felt like before you began the coaching programme with me?

Siffat

Yeah, so I first started coaching around the time of lockdown at the beginning of the year. And I sort of was in a state just searching for answers, searching for ways to better myself, I was already in therapy, and I thought I would benefit from life coaching for the purposes of getting something more structured to benefit sort of my career trajectory.

And the state of mind I was in was, again, like I said, searching, my confidence was very low. As was my self-esteem, I was essentially coming out of a divorce while going through a divorce now coming up coming to the end of it.

But it was a period of just asking questions, being open to different types of solutions, and trying to better me, but I might, I was very, very dampened, I think and was struggling, I think with a lot of anxiety. After going through a very, very diverse.

Tara – High Definition You Coach

Did any resistance come up to the idea of coaching, were there any reasons to not go through coaching?

Siffat

Um, for me, it was more trying to understand how it would really benefit me, like I said, it was already in therapy, and I didn’t understand what the value add would be with life coaching. And you are essentially looking for concrete solutions, whereas therapy is more like a recursive thing, right? You talk about emotion, there’s not necessarily an end in sight.

Whereas life coaching tends to structure your decision making a lot better. And I found that I was able to come to a lot more concrete solutions, and it all felt a bit more tangible.

Whether it’s sending an email or having a conversation with someone to achieve something, I think people who are looking for real-life solutions to any problems that come up come up in their life, whether it’s personal or professional, I think people would definitely benefit from life coaching in that respect.

Tara – High Definition You Coach

Brilliant, and what results have you seen what’s changed for you professionally and personally,

Siffat

For me personally, confidence, I mean, my confidence has really been on the up and how I was able to really physically see that was looking back at the videos on the portal, and the first video that you know, the expression on my face state of mind that I could really tell to now when you know, this bit of Tara and Gita after the life coaching series ended, I could see physically like my face is just brighter, I’m more vivacious, I’m a bit more interactive.

I’m, you know, more certain about my values. I mean, it’s almost like, you know, the hot wax that was, you know, malleable and free-flowing is hard and, and is become more certain, you know, I’m more certain of myself. So the confidence definitely, I’ve seen my career improve, like the types of work that I’ve been involved in myself, and I’m more in the position to speak out about what I deserve.

And, and I’ve seen, you know, people taking an interest in me professionally, and in my work as in job interviews, rolling. It really is not just the, you know, the physical act of writing things down and manifesting and verbally speaking things into existence. It’s about thinking as well. So I think my mindset has also changed.

And I’ve been talking, speaking positively to things that I want in my life, and that has, I’ve really seen the tangible effects of it.

Tara – High Definition You Coach

Fantastic. Did anything happen? Unexpected, where you went? Well, that wasn’t I wasn’t expecting that result.

Siffat

For me, it was how quickly my divorce came through. I didn’t realise it would come as quickly. And I think, again, like I said, I dealt with it. You know, I spent life coaching where you know, you allocate X amount of time to deal with an email from your lawyer, and then after that shut-off, you know, and then deal with your other things.

Don’t let it envelop your life. And because it’s never in my life, I was not constantly at my computer waiting for the next email. I was never waiting. I was moving on with my life. And because I’m moving on with my life. When it came through, it was like, Oh, that happened when I wasn’t.

And it was great because it just goes to show that your life, you know, moves on despite all of the struggles that are happening in the background and you have to learn to compartmentalise not just like it’s not because you’re running away from your feelings. It’s because you’re learning to be efficient with your time, you know, time is finite, it’s a finite resource.

And for me, that happened very quickly. The other thing that happened a lot quicker as well with job interviews was they kept Murali. Oh, how is this happening? Then me being able to present myself in interviews with a confident front as well, which was happening very quickly. I also noticed that the relationships that were entering my life, and the new friends I was making were all positive.

You know, I had a very good circle. But in the past, I would have to have the screening process of like, oh, this person might not know, I’m naturally attracting good people, because of my mindset. So those are some of the unexpected things. Yeah. Yeah,

Tara – High Definition You Coach

That’s brilliant. And what would you say to someone who’s thinking, Oh, should I do this? You know, it’s a lot of time it can be a, it’s a financial investment, what would you say to someone who’s umming and arming about investing in coaching in themselves?

Siffat

I think the Keto is, it’s an investment, it’s an investment in yourself, just like how you’d buy a nice coat, or a nice suit to wear to your first job, right?

I think you should treat life coaching the exact same way. It should be an investment in yourself, and except it’s more personal than something that’s a coach, or they may get stolen suit can, you know get ruined and the drive the dry cleaners, you can’t really go wrong with life coaching, because you’re investing in your state of mind, your sense of being your career, and the moment you take that step, it will mean more dollar signs for you, because of the way you present yourself to the world, people are going to be you know, you know, it’s kind of like the philosophy of the first time you meet someone of perception.

And when people can see that you’re confident, you’re sure of yourself, you know, what you’re talking about, you’re completely engaged, it will mean your prospects, your career prospects will increase not in not just if you want to move job, but if you’re in the same job, the doors will open.

I mean, so many doors have opened for me, and doors, I never thought would open within my own role. And it just goes to show that it that little investment you have in yourself, if it was 1000 or 2000 pounds, it will triple I think in terms of the money you will make over the next years. Once you take that step invest in yourself. So yeah, I would recommend it.

Tara – High Definition You Coach

Investing. And then just to conclude, what would be a short phrase or a word that would sum up where you were, when we began and where you are now.

Siffat

Be better, not bitter. Right? So I think it’s funnily enough, that’s something my ex told me, and he taught me so there are more than one of the good things he was he was good at all of that personal development stuff. But that’s the one phrase that really stuck in life. It throws you curveballs and you, actually, you are not a victim, to whatever happens to you, you have the ability to choose to write bitter, better.

What do you want, right? If you choose bitter, you will only experience bitterness if you choose better and you grow from it. You can only be positive experiences. So you can either choose to have positive or negative responses, a very easy decision. So it’s, I think the other the other one that ties into that is between stimulus and response lies our ability to choose.

And I think that that’s the choice you have bitter or better and I think everyone should really be looking in the direction of better luck.

Tara – High Definition You Coach

That’s fantastic. And that’s been a big part of the coaching journey together. Isn’t it working towards better? Yep. Brilliant. Thank you so much for sharing that with me and with the people who are going to watch this video I’m really thrilled to see how you’re progressing and growing and building the life that you want for yourself and that you deserve. Thank you